True confession: I am a horrid sock matcher. Horrid. Give me a dirty bathroom or window to clean any day over weeding through sock heaven.
Feel better? Know your not alone in abhorring some aspect of keeping up with domestic responsibilities with children.
Typically, I tend to the big basket of unmatched socks when my 3 year old runs out of socks that are fairly similar or my husband runs out of dress socks for work. But lately, my climb through life has been so uphill that I’ve. Just. Let. Go. Of. Sock world.
Do you ever feel like your holding so much together…your ‘do not forget list’…grocery list…reading and tucking in each child…the demands of other teachers and coaches…laundry…homework…dentist appointments…not to mention the 10 things you simply didn’t get to yesterday? So much so that you just have to choose which ball gets dropped?
Well, I knew this was happening but it was a minor ball dropping, so I thought, compared to the other 50 balls I am keeping in the air until one morning last week my husband came into the kitchen to find me stirring grits with a super confused look on his face. “Are YOU wearing MY dress socks?”
Gulp. White faced, suddenly standing naked before him, I found myself embarrassed. “Yes, I am. I couldn’t find any others and didn’t want to wear wool hiking socks,” I said staring down at the grits in hopes to send him back to the room to get ready for work.
“Well, babe I’d appreciate it if you didn’t do that again. I’ve been going downstairs to match socks the night before and it’s really frustrating to be going down there again this morning.”
Caught. Red. Handed. How dumb I felt wearing his stripped black dress socks with the band that grips your calf so they won’t fall down. How I wished I could put my hands on my cute socks that I like. I don’t want to wear mens socks for heaven’s sakes! But, I don’t have time to do it all perfectly and well!!! AHHHH!
Now, it may not be socks, but you know there is some struggle or weakness that has you feeling humbled or inadequate. We all do. What is yours…a strong willed child, a hitter, an inability to get everyone out of the house without yelling. What area are you feeling like You. Just. Can’t. Measure. Up. Anymore.
The mask is falling off and it hurts but it is a good thing my friend.
Although my morning was flooded with insecurities, inadequacies and doubts about my ability to be a good wife, a good mom to four precious children, a homemaker and now a Dr. Sears Health Coach, I must say my afternoon took quite a turn.
I started slaying those bad boy accusations with gusto as I remembered and re-claimed who I am in Christ as a beloved daughter of my Abba. I remembered and spoke out loud these truths…
I measure up not because I keep all my family in clean, matching socks but because of what Jesus did on the cross for me!
I am not under law, but under grace. Romans 6:14
Not that we are adequate in ourselves to consider anything as coming from ourselves, but our adequacy is from God. 2 Corinthians 3:5
Then, I picked up a book I am reading with a group of women titled Grace for the Good Girl ‘letting go of the try-hard life’ by Emily Freeman. It happened to be the chapter about receiving. Listen to these words by Emily…
“If you want to embrace the reality of who he is and who he has made you to be, you first have to release the lie of who you always thought you were.
You are not accepted because you are good.
You are free to be good because you are accepted.
You are not responsible to have it all together.
You are free to respond to the One who holds all things in his hands.
You do not have to live up to impossible expectations.
You are free to wait expectantly on Jesus, the One who is both author and perfecter of your faith.”
Freedom. Thankful. Deep breath. Beginning to be able to laugh at myself and how I wonder what people would think if they knew behind this fun outfit with swank boots were a pair of my husbands socks because I’m so worn thin and disorganized that I couldn’t find my own.
Although I wish all us Mommies could live in the close knit communities folks used to with grandparents and other family around to support and do daily life with, the fact is those days are gone. Golf playing and check out retirement is in. Therefore, we Mamas more than ever need to tap into a loving group of women to share life with, both burdens and birthdays!
How I hope you’ll take a step of courage to find a Mom Heart group in your area. Life is so much grander when we can walk through it with others, knowing we aren’t alone, feeling free to share our sock stories with.