True confession: I am a horrid sock matcher. Horrid. Give me a dirty bathroom or window to clean any day over weeding through sock heaven.
Feel better? Know your not alone in abhorring some aspect of keeping up with domestic responsibilities with children.
Typically, I tend to the big basket of unmatched socks when my 3 year old runs out of socks that are fairly similar or my husband runs out of dress socks for work. But lately, my climb through life has been so uphill that I’ve. Just. Let. Go. Of. Sock world.
Do you ever feel like your holding so much together…your ‘do not forget list’…grocery list…reading and tucking in each child…the demands of other teachers and coaches…laundry…homework…dentist appointments…not to mention the 10 things you simply didn’t get to yesterday? So much so that you just have to choose which ball gets dropped?
Well, I knew this was happening but it was a minor ball dropping, so I thought, compared to the other 50 balls I am keeping in the air until one morning last week my husband came into the kitchen to find me stirring grits with a super confused look on his face. “Are YOU wearing MY dress socks?”
Gulp. White faced, suddenly standing naked before him, I found myself embarrassed. “Yes, I am. I couldn’t find any others and didn’t want to wear wool hiking socks,” I said staring down at the grits in hopes to send him back to the room to get ready for work.
“Well, babe I’d appreciate it if you didn’t do that again. I’ve been going downstairs to match socks the night before and it’s really frustrating to be going down there again this morning.”
Caught. Red. Handed. How dumb I felt wearing his stripped black dress socks with the band that grips your calf so they won’t fall down. How I wished I could put my hands on my cute socks that I like. I don’t want to wear mens socks for heaven’s sakes! But, I don’t have time to do it all perfectly and well!!! AHHHH!
Now, it may not be socks, but you know there is some struggle or weakness that has you feeling humbled or inadequate. We all do. What is yours…a strong willed child, a hitter, an inability to get everyone out of the house without yelling. What area are you feeling like You. Just. Can’t. Measure. Up. Anymore.
The mask is falling off and it hurts but it is a good thing my friend.
Although my morning was flooded with insecurities, inadequacies and doubts about my ability to be a good wife, a good mom to four precious children, a homemaker and now a Dr. Sears Health Coach, I must say my afternoon took quite a turn.
I started slaying those bad boy accusations with gusto as I remembered and re-claimed who I am in Christ as a beloved daughter of my Abba. I remembered and spoke out loud these truths…
I measure up not because I keep all my family in clean, matching socks but because of what Jesus did on the cross for me!
I am not under law, but under grace. Romans 6:14
Not that we are adequate in ourselves to consider anything as coming from ourselves, but our adequacy is from God. 2 Corinthians 3:5
Then, I picked up a book I am reading with a group of women titled Grace for the Good Girl ‘letting go of the try-hard life’ by Emily Freeman. It happened to be the chapter about receiving. Listen to these words by Emily…
“If you want to embrace the reality of who he is and who he has made you to be, you first have to release the lie of who you always thought you were.
You are not accepted because you are good.
You are free to be good because you are accepted.
You are not responsible to have it all together.
You are free to respond to the One who holds all things in his hands.
You do not have to live up to impossible expectations.
You are free to wait expectantly on Jesus, the One who is both author and perfecter of your faith.”
Freedom. Thankful. Deep breath. Beginning to be able to laugh at myself and how I wonder what people would think if they knew behind this fun outfit with swank boots were a pair of my husbands socks because I’m so worn thin and disorganized that I couldn’t find my own.
Although I wish all us Mommies could live in the close knit communities folks used to with grandparents and other family around to support and do daily life with, the fact is those days are gone. Golf playing and check out retirement is in. Therefore, we Mamas more than ever need to tap into a loving group of women to share life with, both burdens and birthdays!
How I hope you’ll take a step of courage to find a Mom Heart group in your area. Life is so much grander when we can walk through it with others, knowing we aren’t alone, feeling free to share our sock stories with.
About Amanda Walters
OK in two weeks time as a single mom of five..I lost my calendar for 2013…got another..lost it again, had three sick children all at different times, had two in county basketball tournaments, celebrated my mom’s birthday, welcomed my brother home from Atlanta for the weekend, got sick myself…even with a fever and had my first date in three years….ON TOP OF NORMAL LIFE OF working everyday and raising my kids and loving God..not necessarily in that order. So thanks for the refreshing reminder about who I am and how God has my back. As for the socks, I gave up years ago and am just hoping one day someone will overlook the fact that even I wear mismatched socks and love me anyway! Hope to meet you in Raleigh. Thanks for the encouragement!
As I chuckle, I too look forward to meeting you one day and believe that will happen! Amazingly beautiful Pam how Father has and is equipping and sustaining you. I am inspired by your life. And just for the record, my girls and I were in Super K today & there was a SOCK sale going on!!! You better believe I jumped on that. Felt so good to present each of my kids with a new pair of matching socks, even though in a few weeks they will be lost again…
We need you in Raleigh-you need the sharing with all of us. Pam wants to meet you and others do, too February 22 and 23!!
Lynn, I SOOOOO want to be there and am kicking myself for not sharpie marking it on the calendar sooner. My husband has been ‘talking’ about taking me somewhere warm for an anniversary for THREE years. Well, we are finally going as he sees I am juggling more balls in the air than ever & need a break. Unfortunately, that weekend is THE weekend he chose & already has everything booked. I am so sorry. I have learned my lesson and will put the NC conference on the calendar sooner.
Encouragement is oxygen for the soul. Thank you for the deep sustaining breath. Amazing grace, indeed.
Thank you Dori for both taking the time to read and being someone whom I treasure lately calling a ‘friend.’ Love that….oxygen for the soul. True indeed. We all need it, don’t we!?!
I am also a mother of four. Our whole family got sick for three months in December causing us to miss a lot of homeschooling. When we started back up in January, that very week we ended up in the hospital with my oldest son with the diagnosis of the onset of Diabetes Type 1. He was in a very fragile state. It was scary. Two weeks later, we are all sick again! Socks are the last thing on my mind.
It feels like my plate keeps getting bigger and bigger as God gives more responsibility. It is humbling. I’m positive if we had only a couple of children that I would THINK I had it all together. God is good to give us what we need to humble us and make s cry out, “Only by His grace!”
I used to pride myself in never losing a sock in the wash. That was ten years ago. I currently have no idea whose socks are in my sock drawer!
I would live to go to a Mom Heart Conference, but money is tight.
Shannon, what a hard, exhausting, scary experience of sickness. Those times truly bring forth what is truly important don’t they?!? It is so good to hear from anohter Mama of 4 and your words that the responsibilities keep getting bigger and bigger. I’d love to meet you! Could we connect over email? Are you in NC? Email me to say Hi & let me know where you live. We go to the beach in the summer & it’s a great time to meet up with folks for lunch along the way (break up the LOOONGG trip). I would be blessed right now to have a fellow Mama that’s out there seeking to abide in Jesus & let the main things be the main things.
thewaltersfarm@yahoo.com Look forward to hearing from you!
The picture says it all! Love this.
I feel your pain… I gave up on matching socks until I hit upon a new strategy. I now buy all one color of the same sock. I have been heard to say in the store “No you may not have fancy socks you may have the same kind as your sister.” !0 minutes of complaints for hours and hours of my life back! Matching socks is so easy now that I only have 3 kinds of socks in the wash (for the most part) yes I have a few fancy pairs but those end up in the odd sock box and if the kids want them they can match them up themselves!