Here lies a lovely little blue measuring cup. It’s part of a set given to me by one of my best friends almost ten years ago. It brought beauty to mundane recipes. But its delicate constitution was no match for three year old hands.
I know I am not the only mother with incomplete dish sets, broken necklaces, and stained carpet. It comes with the territory.
But what a relief they are just things – inanimate, unemotional, dust-collecting things. They will all pass away eventually. Even if they perish sooner than I desire, they are absolutely not worth demeaning and demoralizing the sensitive young spirits in my care.
As Sheldon VanAuken writes in one of my favorite books, A Severe Mercy, “Over-valued possessions [are] a burden, possessing their owners.” He and his wife strove to resist being possessed by their possessions, even going so far as intentionally denting their new car so they would not feel too attached.
I value that mentality. I will teach my children to practice respect and gentleness when handling possessions, of course – particularly other people’s possessions. But I recognize that every thing I have is temporary. The souls of my children are eternal and I want them to leave my home one day believing I valued their hearts over my possessions.
And not only do I want them to see me choose them over material things, I want them to see me choose others over material things. I want them to understand that the life of Jesus was not marked by an accumulation of possessions, but by the storing up of relationships and the pouring out of self. His focus was not on acquiring for himself. Rather, he used his limited time on earth to counter-culturally resist that which the world called valuable, and embrace that which the world called unlovely.
May we work to give our children a deeper understanding of the way of Jesus by demonstrating a proper level of care to the things and the people around us.
About Katy Rose
Oh yes, this is a real issue – especially if you have boys! With 4 boys and a little girl there is nothing “sacred” in my house. Not being possessed by my things has been a long journey and I’m glad to say that I am further down this road than when we first started our family. Stewardship is an important concept to convey to our children but accidents do happen and our response to those accidents communicates beyond our words. Thank you for this thought-provoking article!!
Beth, I imagine with 5 children you have learned a few lessons on this subject! Thank you so much for sharing such great words.
What a beautiful reminder, friend. It’s good for me for to be reminded of this right now, as we start entering the mobile phase with Cruz. I’m sure as he gets a little older, broken things will become a semi normal occurance.
Love this! I catch myself far too often that I would like getting upset over some THING and hurting the feelings of my little ones or even others. This is short and sweet but hits home hard. Thank you.
How powerful is the reminder that I would want to be valued over my children’s things, yet how often have I lost my beans over my own “broken cup”. I know those measuring cups, by the way. I have them too, and I keep them in a cabinet on display because I could never find a practical place to store them in my cabinet.
Katy, what a wonderful post and a sobering reminder for me! Too often I find my home and the things in it to be a picture of me “having it together”. The truth is I should be trying my best to show Christ to my boys and letting their hearts be the source of my joy and “success” as a homemaker. Thank you for this.