About Katy Rose

Katy Rose, an artist at heart, is married to her high-school prom date and mama to two smiley and non-stop little boys. A life-long journaler, her blogging adventures began in 2005 while documenting life as a newlywed in Maui, continued as she settled down in New York City for several years, and then took a new turn with babies arriving and a relocation to Oklahoma for her husband’s legal education.
While living in NYC, she was employed as a project manager by a foundation that worked with domestic violence victims, and spent some time outside of work serving pregnant women short on resources and support. She and her husband also work to raise awareness about the issue of human trafficking.
Katy is passionate about adoption, mercy, and her family, as well as cooking, chocolate, coffee, creating, all things European, and would never pass up a real-life, inspirational story.
Marriage and motherhood have been major tools for refinement. She’s currently clinging to God’s promise that his grace is sufficient and his power is made perfect in her weakness. She writes at her blog Embrace and Let Go

Deepening Friendships (Upon Leaving My Friends)

May 12, 2013 by Katy Rose · 10 Comments

It’s late at night and I’ve just returned from a visit to an Urgent Care center with my son who was showing some troubling symptoms. On my way there, one of my close friends got wind of what was happening and within moments of sitting down in the waiting room, my phone started beeping repeatedly with new text messages.

Several of my friends had been put on alert and were praying, sending kind words, and offering all kinds of help. That’s just how they are. God has graciously supplied irreplaceable girls in my life.

The crushing part is that as I type, I’m sitting here surrounded by boxes. Our family is moving in a few days and, after four such moves in the last eight years, I know well the effect distance can have on friendships. They will still be some of my dearest friends, but the nature of our relationships will most likely change. Though I have no doubt new and wonderful friendships await where we’re going, it’s an honor to carry memories of these ladies with me.

From childhood through the present, incredible girls have impacted and changed my life. Varying personalities and unique qualities contribute to the beautiful tapestry of relationships. The makings of deep friendship can be summed up in many ways, but here are a few things I’ve learned from those nearest to me. [Read more...]

Filed Under: Cultivating A Life, Family LIfe, Uncategorized

Neon Green Duct Tape for Shattered Windows

April 3, 2013 by Katy Rose · 6 Comments

Through my kitchen window I see the back of my neighbor’s house. There aren’t privacy fences in our neighborhood, leaving us all exposed.

The three windows that line the back are all broken. One is shattered, still intact but resembling a huge spider web. The other two are taped together haphazardly with neon green duct tape.

The exterior of the home reflects the reality inside: brokenness.

If the walls inside could talk they’d tell of abandonment, near-death experiences, police visits, confusion, substances, and tears. They would tell the story of a single mom trying for years to support her single daughter and young grandson.

Within five minutes of over-the-fence chatting, you know the painful state of things. Sometimes deep brokenness leads to seclusion; sometimes it clambers in desperation for anyone who will listen. Our neighbor is driven towards the latter.

Her grandson routinely hops the little fence to play and we enjoy having him. Not a conversation goes by that he doesn’t wishfully mention the next time he might see his dad.

As I wash dishes and peer out back through the window I think about brokenness, hidden and exposed. Some of us go to great extents to hide it; others cover very little. The neon green tape holding the window pieces together is striking.

I think back on the lines I’ve repeated often since becoming a mother: [Read more...]

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Be Not Possessed

March 1, 2013 by Katy Rose · 6 Comments

Here lies a lovely little blue measuring cup. It’s part of a set given to me by one of my best friends almost ten years ago. It brought beauty to mundane recipes. But its delicate constitution was no match for three year old hands.

I know I am not the only mother with incomplete dish sets, broken necklaces, and stained carpet. It comes with the territory.

But what a relief they are just things – inanimate, unemotional, dust-collecting things. They will all pass away eventually. Even if they perish sooner than I desire, they are absolutely not worth demeaning and demoralizing the sensitive young spirits in my care.

As Sheldon VanAuken writes in one of my favorite books, A Severe Mercy, “Over-valued possessions [are] a burden, possessing their owners.” He and his wife strove to resist being possessed by their possessions, even going so far as intentionally denting their new car so they would not feel too attached.

I value that mentality. I will teach my children to practice respect and gentleness when handling possessions, of course – particularly other people’s possessions. But I recognize that every thing I have is temporary. The souls of my children are eternal and I want them to leave my home one day believing I valued their hearts over my possessions.

And not only do I want them to see me choose them over material things, I want them to see me choose others over material things. I want them to understand that the life of Jesus was not marked by an accumulation of possessions, but by the storing up of relationships and the pouring out of self. His focus was not on acquiring for himself. Rather, he used his limited time on earth to counter-culturally resist that which the world called valuable, and embrace that which the world called unlovely.

May we work to give our children a deeper understanding of the way of Jesus by demonstrating a proper level of care to the things and the people around us.

Filed Under: Uncategorized

How Truth-Filled Words Make a Difference

February 16, 2013 by Katy Rose · 13 Comments

“I love you. I am for you. I enjoy you”

This powerful phrase comes from my husband’s mouth often as he speaks to our children.

I hadn’t realized the weight of the words until he first directed them at me. There was something to it. I am loved. This I know, but one can never hear it enough. Someone is for me, really cares, works for my best. And maybe the most striking of all – I am enjoyed, even when I don’t feel enjoyable. To believe that my husband, and not to mention God, enjoys me was… profound.

I’ve started saying it too with our little ones and the response is amazing. It is particularly effective in moments of disobedience or discipline. In that instant when our children feel most rebellious or want nothing to do with us they hear these words. I love you. I am for you. I enjoy you.

We say it in our home because it reflects the truth of God. Without sending a deep theological lesson over the heads of our very young children, we’re able to teach and tangibly show them (though imperfectly) a glimpse of the love their Heavenly Father gives. As children of God, because of what Jesus did in taking the punishment for our sin on the cross, a whole new existence is made possible. We are loved by God. He is for us. And he enjoys us. Let it sink in.

When we ask our sons to do something, to obey when they don’t feel like it, we look them in their eyes and remind them of these three things. We have them repeat it, believe it.

Trust is made easier for them, and for us. They are loved, there is someone for them, and they are enjoyed.

And so are we.

For further reading…

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! 1 John 3:1

He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? Romans 8:32

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28

The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Finding Peace in the New Year and a Giveaway!

January 16, 2013 by Katy Rose · 6 Comments


There are days I find myself grappling for a sense of peace. It sometimes eludes me.
I want to be a peaceful wife and mother. I want to be the kind of friend who exudes peace and whose home is filled with it.
But in this season of life everything seems to be working against me. Life feels in limbo, jobs up in the air, and sickness has invaded our home.  My precious little boys are full of energy and life with no regard for cleanliness, order, or sleep.

Yet, peace is here through the power of the Holy Spirit. It is available and powerful amidst it all.
Some days I have to change my perception of what peace looks like.
 
Peace I leave with you;
My peace I give to you
I do not give to you as the world gives.

 To find real peace, I must understand what peace is and what it is not.
It is not a peace that the world promises: a sense of control wrapped up in myself, or a feeling that I’ve arrived or have it all together. I will not find it in a clean home or folded laundry. I won’t find peace in well-behaved children or a certain parenting method. Because:
…to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.
Peace is where the Spirit of God dwells.
Peace is given by the Spirit of God alone.
Peace is not something the world has to offer us, some finally-accomplished alignment of circumstances that create a sense of comfort.
In Psalm 23 peace comes while walking through a most treacherous place -- the Valley of the Shadow of Death. But David finds peace because the Lord is with him. Throughout God’s word, peace is spoken of in the context of pain, war, unrest and trial.
Jesus’ life was not a walk in the park. Scripture says he was a man of many sorrows whose life ended, before his resurrection, in betrayal and murder.
To live as a peaceful wife, mother and friend requires (1) recognition of my need for the Spirit of God, and (2) a request for his presence, even in the midst of the everyday chaos. His peace, true peace - really does “surpass all understanding.” It has an indescribable power to “guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus.”
When I set my mind on the Spirit and stop trying to gain a sense of peace from my life circumstances, there in the Spirit is peace.

 Heavenly Father,
May your indescribable and supernatural peace rest upon us as we mother today, by the power of your Spirit alone. 
May my children have a greater understanding of who you are by the peace they see reflected in their mother. 
Lord, I cannot be peaceful without you. I don’t have the strength. Show me how to trust you, decreasing in pride and anxiety, increasing in faith and peace. 
We thank you, Father that you have promised us this gift.
In your perfect Son’s name we pray, Amen.
 Scripture referenced:
John 14:27, Romans 8:6, Philippians 4:
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		Filed Under: Cultivating A Life, Uncategorized


		

				Embrace and Let Go 
		
		December 30, 2012  by  Katy Rose · 31 Comments 
		
			
It was the dead of winter in the West Village of New York City the night my first son was born.  He did not enter the world easily, and after almost two days of extreme physical exertion, pain, and sleeplessness , my husband and I were both exhausted. Delirious, really.

The next 72 hours of our hospital stay were a bit of a blur. My family had not yet arrived, and my weak body was not ready to receive visitors. I was uncomfortable and longed for my home.
The doctors decided to keep our baby a few more days, but my husband and I were instructed to check out and make room for others.
Fortunately, a kind nurse took pity, ushering us down a hall to an old room no longer in use.  She said that we would be “off the radar” and that they would call at nursing time.
We ordered Chinese food and pulled up a movie on our computer. There we lay, curled up together on a twin-size hospital bed as the snow fell outside. The room felt cold and dark. My sore body could hardly move.

When my husband stepped out for a few moments I lay there in the quiet, all alone.
Truthfully, my heart was sinking. I felt trapped.
I mourned the loss of life with just my husband. I already missed the independence and freedom we enjoyed for almost five years.
What I really wanted was to go somewhere with only him and return to normal life.
The pulls and demands of this child held me captive.
Of course I loved our baby beyond belief, and I wasn’t truly wishing him away.  But in those dark moments I was straddling two worlds: the past and the present. I was trying, impossibly, to exist in both. I had to make the final jump.  I had to let go of the old and fully embrace the new.
So I did. And I’ve never prayed so much in my entire life as I did over those next few days, weeks and months.

The nursing pain, the sleepless haze, and war wounds from birth- all tangible reflections of the state of my heart as well. The transition into life with a baby was not quite the smooth, cuddly one I had envisioned.  I longed for the comforts of my old life which possessed some semblance of control.
I prayed through the colic, the seemingly unending crying, and I asked God what I could learn from it all. I clung to his promises.
The Lord was near and words like these from  2 Corinthians came to mind frequently:
“My grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in your weakness.”

Little has changed circumstantially since then, but God has graciously been at work in my heart. He has allowed me to feel such fulfillment and joy in this work. I consider each day with my children a priceless treasure.
I sometimes find myself grasping for my former independence. Those moments point me toward the eternal reality that my life is not my own, but Christ’s. I am his. In his grace, he has given me to the devoted service and love of my family – as a wife, and as a mother.

And that’s part of the beautiful and painful journey of motherhood.
It’s about refinement and sacrifice. It’s about recognizing my inability and selfishness, and then pressing hard onward, completely enveloped in His grace.

So today when a trail of little ones follows me into the bathroom at a moment when privacy would be nice, when a tantrum rings out in the grocery store, when the coveted nap time evades us entirely, I still celebrate motherhood.
I celebrate the incredible gifts God has given in these children.
And I celebrate the way he makes me more Christlike by the grace and strength only he can provide.
		

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