I write a lot about building a heritage for our children with books, beauty, and creativity… all to provide wonderful memories of hearth & home.  Such a quest is all good and true but living in a world such as ours, life is not all picnics and tea time.  Rarely does a child become an adult without a family experiencing trials and tribulations… and some more than others.

Recently I had lunch with my son and he was telling me about the pressures of work and of long nights finishing projects on his computer at home.  In between bites of a McDonald’s chicken wrap sandwich, he described both the challenges causing the extra work load and the satisfaction which comes with seeing one of his iPad app designs ready for “launch” after a year in the design phase.

He is no stranger to grueling nights of hard work after studying Computer Science at the University.  He didn’t quit although there were entire semesters when he felt like it.  Persistence helped my daughter get through her design degree and even more so as the mother of five young children.

Both have a “never give up” attitude that didn’t come from our picnics at the park or Saturday morning strolls on the Boardwalk in Saugatuck.   They learned how to handle the difficulties of life by actually living through such times as they were growing up in our household.

As children become adults, they receive advice from multiple sources but by far the biggest influence on how they relate to adversity comes from the way they saw their parents handle it.  Did Dad ask the family to pray for God’s provision?  When trials suddenly came out of nowhere, did Mom come unglued (so to speak) or did the children see her open her Bible and read the verses which brought her most comfort?

The older I become and I look back on this journey of life, the more I realize God never wasted a trial I went through.  They were not fun at the time; some were so difficult I felt I had to remind myself to breath.  Especially those specifically life altering situations in which even the near future was shrouded in the fog of the unknown.  Where will we live?  How will we put food on the table?  Will the illness be overcome?  What does tomorrow hold for us?

Many times the fog of the unknown lifted only enough to show the next step on our journey.  However, there were also those days when the answer to prayer arrived in such a way that our family knew only God could have engineered such a miracle… and we learned from the trial.  What did we learn? [Read more...]

Happy Mother’s Day

“Every one of you shall respect his mother and his father. I am the LORD your God” Leviticus 19:3

Mother’s Day will be celebrated on Sunday, the 12th of May, honoring mothers and their influence in society. Others honored include stepmothers, relatives, mother in laws, a guardian/foster parent, or a family friend. For over a hundred years we have set aside one day a year to honor mothers.

Anna Jarvis is recognized as the founder of Mother’s Day. Anna herself never married nor had children but in 1908 she had a memorial service in honor of her beloved mother, because she was dedicated to all mothers being honored. Anna said, “This should be a day to honor the best mother who ever lived – YOUR mother.”  “Mother’s Day” became a recognized holiday in the United States after President Woodrow Wilson signed and declared the second Sunday in May as Mother’s Day on May 8, 1914.   By the 1920’s Ms. Jarvis was greatly disappointed with the commercialization of the day as she sought for the day to be one of sentiment, not profit. I fear she would be horrified by how commercialized Mothers Day has become.

• In the United States, there are about 85.4 million mothers. (US Census Bureau) and 2 billion mothers in the world.
• 96% of American consumers celebrate Mother’s Day (Hallmark)
• Mother’s day is the third-largest card-sending holiday in the United States. According to Hallmark, an average of 141 million cards will be given on Mother’s Day.
• The total amount of money spent on Mother’s day cards is $671 million dollars. (Statistic Brain)
• Retailers report that Mother’s Day is the second highest gift-giving holiday, behind Christmas, in the United States.
• Consumers spent an average of $152 on their mothers in 2012, an increase of 8% from 2011. (National Retail Federation)
• 66% of us send flower arrangements totaling in 2.2 billion. (National Retail Federation)
• The highest telephone volume occurs on Mother’s Day.
• 54% of us take our mother’s out to eat, spending $3.4 billion.
• The total amount of money that will be spent on Mothers day is $18.6 billion (Compared to $9.4 billion spent on Father’s Day. (National Retail Federation)

As a mother of a 24, 22, and 12-year-old, I question why we need a single day set aside to recognize moms as I believe everyday is a day to show honor and respect to our mothers as commanded several times throughout the bible – honor your father and mother, so you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you. (Exodus 20:12)  The art of appreciation doesn’t come naturally. In our home we have brought up our daughters to honor, appreciate, and love their parents each day. If they aren’t grateful throughout the year for all we do as parents, do you think one day will make up for the other 364?

Personally I don’t feel more or less loved the second Sunday in May. Receiving a store bought gift doesn’t validate my identity as a mother. Being a mother is defined in the daily moments of motherhood. These days I eagerly embrace future family gatherings, as love for me is T-I-M-E together.  I’m grateful for the many memories we have cultivated over the years as a core family value has been to spend time together.

If you seek to avoid the commercialization of Mothers Day let me share a few practical ways you can thoughtfully recognize, bless, appreciate, and/or honor your mom, mother-in-law, and mother like figures throughout the year. [Read more...]

If you were to ask Veronica how her Spring break was, she might answer, “crummy.”  It’s true, when you spend the weeks before making lists, discussing the options of sleeping in, having fun and doing, “what we don’t often do,” sort of things and get sick, crummy is just the word.  The weekend before she had to go back to school, I knew redemption needed to break in.  Daddy got the tail end of sickness and I took the two older ones on an afternoon date.

We had the grandest of times, painting pottery, searching the toy store for a birthday gifts and finishing it with gelato.  The sun broke through the rainy Pacific Northwest sky and everything appeared to be right with the world.  There were no meltdowns, screaming, or blame games.  I could see the sweetness of two sisters and a mama in right relationship.

*******

The next morning, Papa was still sick. I left the babe with him, while I took the two older ones to church.

Truth be told, and maybe you can relate, I was running thin from a week of being on double duty with sickness and quite honestly, life just doesn’t stop for you to catch up.  I wanted so badly to breathe in deeply the Spirit and breathe out my own woes.  We were not even one minute into the worship, when my oldest burst. [Read more...]

Its mid-day, little man is asleep and the girls and I have quiet space to finish our read aloud. It’s the amazing true story of Corrie Ten Boom and her faithfulness and perseverance during World War II. She has just lost her sister in Ravensbruck concentration camp after months of being herded around like cattle, and the German’s many attempts at stripping her of her dignity and faith. She wasn’t sure what was coming. There were rumors of all of the women her age being killed the next day. She was sick and heartbroken when she was given freedom papers allowing her to return to her home in Holland.

Sharing this story with my girls made it very real, very raw. The looks of misunderstanding on their faces, the every now and then question, “Is this a true story?” reminded me of the horrors that so many had to live through. Are living through. I had crossed over to become a sympathetic reader, immersed in the reality of this story. [Read more...]